Playground Confessions, Part I
Maybe I have a warm, inviting, sympathetic look to me. Or maybe these moms are just lonely. But one thing is clear, people need someone to talk to out there in playground-world.
The setting: I am with Michelle at a local playground on a super sunny day. All the moms are huddling around the one table that's in the shade while our children run screaming by and we try to swipe them with sunblock or douse them with water.
The players: Michelle, Me, a 30-something mom of a toddler and a new born who looks as though she "did big things" before this whole mom thing, and a late-20s super chic low rider jeans mom of a little boy.
The wind up: I ask the "did big things" mom how things were going with the newborn and all. She starts with a timid, "Oh, okay..." and then lets it loose by telling us she can't handle the newborn crying and leaves her alone to cry while she tries to sleep. She feels guilty but is desperate. After a little "there, there, poor thing" and a some "have you tried swaddling/a swing/a sling/some valium," we move onto the next topic, husbands. "Did big things" mom says that having a baby has not helped her marriage as dh (dear husband, for all you non-bulletin board people) doesn't understand her anymore.
The main confession: The low rider jeans mom pipes in with a confession of her own--she is separated from her husband over these same issues and is seeking a divorce. Not exactly trained in family therapy, Michelle and I take Grace and Conner throwing sand at each other as our cue to leave. "Good luck," we say to the moms, as we high-tail it out of there.
The wrap-up: I'm all for sharing with other moms, and I don't claim to always keep my own personal stuff to myself either, but these women were total strangers. It wasn't like we'd talked for 30 minutes about nothing and then they unloaded. The confessions were like the second thing out of their mouths!
Th analysis: It is unnatural for humans to be parenting in isolation the way we do today in this culture. We need to have a network of other moms who are doing this with us and who have done it before to share with and learn from.
Stay tuned for the next installment of....Playground Confessions!
The setting: I am with Michelle at a local playground on a super sunny day. All the moms are huddling around the one table that's in the shade while our children run screaming by and we try to swipe them with sunblock or douse them with water.
The players: Michelle, Me, a 30-something mom of a toddler and a new born who looks as though she "did big things" before this whole mom thing, and a late-20s super chic low rider jeans mom of a little boy.
The wind up: I ask the "did big things" mom how things were going with the newborn and all. She starts with a timid, "Oh, okay..." and then lets it loose by telling us she can't handle the newborn crying and leaves her alone to cry while she tries to sleep. She feels guilty but is desperate. After a little "there, there, poor thing" and a some "have you tried swaddling/a swing/a sling/some valium," we move onto the next topic, husbands. "Did big things" mom says that having a baby has not helped her marriage as dh (dear husband, for all you non-bulletin board people) doesn't understand her anymore.
The main confession: The low rider jeans mom pipes in with a confession of her own--she is separated from her husband over these same issues and is seeking a divorce. Not exactly trained in family therapy, Michelle and I take Grace and Conner throwing sand at each other as our cue to leave. "Good luck," we say to the moms, as we high-tail it out of there.
The wrap-up: I'm all for sharing with other moms, and I don't claim to always keep my own personal stuff to myself either, but these women were total strangers. It wasn't like we'd talked for 30 minutes about nothing and then they unloaded. The confessions were like the second thing out of their mouths!
Th analysis: It is unnatural for humans to be parenting in isolation the way we do today in this culture. We need to have a network of other moms who are doing this with us and who have done it before to share with and learn from.
Stay tuned for the next installment of....Playground Confessions!
posted by Sarah at 9:17 PM
1 Comments:
This is all so insightful. Your descriptions are flawless... I think there is something about you that makes people feel safe telling you their life story. Foreshadowing for a future career?
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